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Old Year Gone; New Year Come

1/2/2023

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As this year draws to a close, I find myself reflecting a lot about how much I have changed since the start of 2022. When last year kicked off, I was struggling to accept that I wouldn’t be returning to teaching (and trying to find work), I weighed roughly 70 lbs more than I do now, and, despite signing my contract prior to this, my book seemed like it might never fully come to be. I am now looking at roughly 80 copies sold in Canada, the USA, and the UK. I am feeling both humbled and grateful for the changes that have taken place in my life. I am also very grateful to everyone who has purchased a copy of my book and it is my sincere hope that I will be able to publish the second of the Small Town Slashers Series if all continues to go well.
          With that said. I am also in a place where I can see that I still have a long way to go. Although I have got myself on medication for my mental wellness, I have yet to find a therapist I feel comfortable working with since the first one my medical coverage supplied (back when I was still teaching) ran out. I also still struggle to establish any sort of consistent routines beyond those dictated by my work schedule. Finally, I wish to be more consistent with my writing, as it is my goal to both maintain this blog and complete the writing of books 3 and 4 of my series this year. To do so, I am planning to write 2500-5000 words weekly, as well as maintain this blog bi-weekly. I also plan to put back into place a proper sleep routine so that I can better structure my days around my work schedule and thus make better use of my time off. I am also going to try to seek a new counselor and a new doctor (one closer to where I live) this year so I can keep improving my mental health and avoid the slips back into depression that plagued me this past autumn.
          Although this is quite a bit to commit myself to, I cannot help but smile when I stare at these challenges that I am setting for myself in 2023. Though the skeptical voice in my head has its doubts, I am truly inspired by how much I have grown in 2022, when those doubts seemed so much more like truths to me. Although I am nervous about what the future will bring, I am not afraid to do what I need to so that I can make my goals become a reality. I know this blog seems short, and I hope it doesn’t feel like I am posting this to brag. My true goal is to share with you that dreams can come true if you commit yourself to them. I have my goals for the year, and I have my plan set for achieving them. What are yours?
          I wish to leave you with a poem I wrote a long time ago. I have been thinking a lot lately about time and about how I wish to make the best use of whatever time I may have left in this world. That’s why I felt this would be a good share to end my post with. I hope you enjoy it.
 
Time
She stares out across
The sparkling water
And some how she knows

She can sense the first chill
And knows winter approaches
Bringing on the fierce cold
 
The air is moist
Soon snow will cover the Earth
Like a blanket of death
 
The rose next to her
Has begun to wilt
And soon all that’s green will be gone
 
She stares at the sunset and knows
It is setting on her life
And she sheds a single tear.
By: Jeremy Gernhaelder

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    Darker Thoughts from a Small Town Mind

    Regular blog posts from the author of the Small Town Slashers Series on everything from the writing process for my next books to the daily struggle of living with depression and social anxiety.

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